Friday, 9 December 2016

Demonetisation

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How we see the same situation from different perspectives...

*Exhibit A*

*_A Small Story_*

To hunt crocodiles, the pond was dried.
No crocodiles were found because they can live on land too.

But all the small fish died.

This story has nothing to do with Demonetisation.




*Exhibit B*

*_The longer version of the small story_*

In another village the pond had really dirty water .. For years (about 60) despite having a huge pond poor farmers had to look upwards to the sky for water for their families ..the pond was never cleaned. The crocodiles were never hunted and no one cared if the fishes died . The water remained murky and could never be used for drinking. The entire village never grew to its potential. Then one day a man took upon himself the challange and decided  to clean the water. Some people who used to sell water tankers to the villagers were not happy and they did every bit to make sure that the man would not succeed.. They threw back dirt in water.. They pulled out the dead fish and called it outcome of water cleaning act.. They blamed it on the guy who was cleaning the water..

While most saw what was happening some still went wayward..

These guys now said that they could still see the crocodile in the water.. They said hey.. The crocodiles are still there .. We can clearly see them. So whats changed

Now thats the moral of the story.. This was never about hunting the crocodile..

This was always about giving fresh water to the village and to make sure the crocs are visible.. So that if they need to be hunted they can be hunted

This long story has everything to do with demonetization and as for the man who wanted to clean the water ..

He's now  planning other cleanups..

So.. in the end that's just how you look at it...ЁЯЩВ

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Go Cashless

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The Prime Minister said,
"Go Cashless"......
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Only ATM's have taken it seriously.
ЁЯШБЁЯШАЁЯШмЁЯШЗ

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One Way

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During the Soviet dictatorship of Stalin, he (Stalin) came to one Politburo meeting with a live chicken. He started to pluck its feathers one by one off.

The chicken quacked in pain, blood oozing from its pores. It gave out heartbreaking cries but Stalin continued without remorse plucking feather after feather until the chicken was completely naked. After that, he threw the chicken on the ground and from his pockets, took out some chicken feed and started to throw it at the poor creature. It started eating and as he walked away, the chicken followed him and sat at his feet feeding from his hand.

Stalin then told members of his party leadership "This chicken represents the people, you must disempower them, brutalise them, beat them up and leave them. If you do this and then give them peanuts when they are in that helpless and desperate situation, they will blindly follow you for the rest of their life.They will think you are a hero forever. They will forget that, it is you who brought them to that situation in the first place."

Does this sound familiar?

Should not blame Appollo hospital.  When you enter greams Road and turn towards Appollo hospital, there is a sign board 'One Way'.   In spite of that many are admitted.ЁЯШЬ

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Volumes of confusion

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One day an  aeroplane cleaner was cleaning the pilots' cockpit when he saw a book entitled "How to fly an aeroplane for beginners. Volume One".

He opened the first page which said, "To start the engine, press the red button.".  He did so and the airplane engine started.

He was happy and opened the next page. "To set airplane moving press the blue button."

He did so and the aeroplane started moving at an amazing speed.

He wanted to fly so he opened the third page which read, "To let the aeroplane fly, please press the green button."

He did this and the plane started to fly.
He was excited!!!!!!

After 20 minutes of flying, he was satisfied and wanted to land so he decided to go to the fourth page.

He fainted after reading the instructions…….

The fourth page read, "To learn how to land, please purchase Volume Two at the nearest bookshop!!!!

Title of the book was

DEMONETIZATION.
(The govt too is confused now as to how to land safely.)

ЁЯШДЁЯШДЁЯШД

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Monday, 7 November 2016

Saudi Arabia is banning Chess Game

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Saudi Arabia is banning chess, calling it a dangerous game....
Reasons are :
1. Queen doesn't wear a burkha.
2. Queen roams freely wherever she wants to.
3. Queen is more powerful than the King.
4. Queen goes alone to opponent's territory.
5. And....Most importantly, there's only one Queen !!
ЁЯШБЁЯШВЁЯШВЁЯШВ

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Taxation addiction

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wife:-  Darling, how much do you love me ????

Husband:-    86.5%

Wife:-   Huh, why it is not 100%   ????

Husband :-  13.5% VAT is applicable on all transactions.

ЁЯШЬЁЯШЬЁЯШЬЁЯШЬЁЯШЬЁЯШЬЁЯШЬЁЯШЬ

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US presidential election results

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The US Presidential
choice is now all about
choosing between ....

the one who was weak
with E-mails and the
one who was weak
with Fe-males....!!!

GOD BLESS AMERICA

ЁЯШВЁЯШВЁЯШВ

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Saturday, 5 November 2016

Taj hotel group's Workshop by a Japanese

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MUDA
The Taj hotel group had invited Mr. Masai Imai from Japan to hold a workshop for its staff.
The staff were very sceptical - the hotel is doing excellent business, this person from Japan has no exposure to hotel industry - what exactly is he going to teach?
But everybody gathered as planned for the workshop in the conference hall sharp at 9 am.
Mr. Masai was introduced to them - a not so impressive personality, nor was  the English all that good.
"Good morning! Let's start work. I am told this is a workshop; but I see neither work nor shop.
So let's proceed where work is happening Let's start with the first room on the first floor."
That happened to be the laundry room of the hotel.
Mr. Masai entered the room and stood at the window, "beautiful view!" he said.
The staff knew it; they need not invite a Japanese consultant to tell them this!
"A room with such a beautiful view is being wasted as a laundry room. Shift the laundry to the basement and convert this into a guest room."
Nobody had ever thought about that!
The manager said, "Yes, it can be done."
"Then let's do it," Mr. Masai said.
"Yes sir, I will make a note of this and we will include it in the report on the workshop that will be prepared."
"Excuse me, but there is nothing to note down in this. Let's just do it,
just now." said Mr. Masai.
"Just now?"
"Yes, decide on a room on the ground floor/basement and shift the stuff out of this room right away. It should take a couple of hours, right?" asked Mr. Masai.
"Yes."
"Let's come back here just before lunch. By then all this stuff will have got shifted out and the room must be ready with the carpets, furniture etc. and from today you can start earning the few thousand that you charge your customers for a night."
"Ok, Sir." The manager had no option.
The next destination was the pantry. The group entered. At the entrance were two huge sinks full of plates to be washed.
Mr. Masai removed his jacket and started washing the plates.
"Sir, Please, what are you doing?" the manager didn't know what to say and what to do.
"Why, I am washing the plates",  said Mr. Masai.
"But sir, there is staff here to do that."
Mr. Masai continued
washing, "I think sink is for washing plates, there are stands here to keep the plates and the plates should go into the stands."
All the officials wondered - did they require a consultant to tell them this?
Mr. Masai asked, "How many plates do you have?'
"Plenty, so that there should never be any shortage." answered the Manager.
Mr. Masai said, "We have a word in Japanese -'Muda'. Muda means delay, Muda means unnecessary spending.
One lesson to be learned in this workshop is to avoid both. If you have plenty of plates, there will be delay in cleaning them up. The first step to correct this situation is to remove all the excess plates."
"Yes, we will say this in the report" said the Manager.
"No, wasting our time in writing the report is again an instance of 'Muda'.
We must pack the extra plates in a box right away and send these to whichever other section of Taj requires them Throughout the workshop now we will find out where all we find this 'Muda' hidden."
And then at every spot and session, the staff eagerly awaited to find out Muda and learn how to avoid it.
On the last day, Mr. Masai told them this story...
"A Japanese and an American, both fond of hunting, met in a jungle. They entered a deep jungle and suddenly realized that they had run out of bullets.
Just then they heard a lion roaring. Both started running. But the Japanese took a short break to put on his sports shoes.
The American said, "What are you doing? We must first get to the car."
The Japanese responded, "No. I only have to ensure that I remain ahead of you."
All the participants engrossed in listening to the story, realized suddenly that the lion would stop after getting his victim!
"The lesson is: competition in today's world is so fierce, that it is important to stay ahead of other, even by just a couple of steps. And you have such a huge and naturally well endowed country. If you remember to curtail your production expenditure and give the best quality always, you will be miles ahead as compared to so many other countries in the world.", concluded Mr. Masai.
MUDA!
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Friday, 4 November 2016

Wife's troll for Army commando

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Wednesday, 2 November 2016

Every Husbands' Dream

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Wednesday, 20 July 2016

Performance, Not Position That Counts.....!!!!!!

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A Priest dies & is waiting in line at Heaven's Gate.

Ahead of him is a guy, fashionably dressed, in dark sun glasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket & jeans.

God to the guy :
'' Who Are You....???? ''

Guy :
'' I am Udupi -Mangalore Express Bus driver.....!!!! ''

God : Take this Gold robe & enter kingdom of heaven.

God to the Priest : Who Are You.....???? ''

Priest : I am a priest & spent 40yrs preaching good to people.

God :
'' Take this cotton Robe and enter heaven......!!!! ''

Priest :
'' God, how come that foul mouthed, rash driver gets a Gold &
I spent all my life preaching Good, get Cotton......!!!!! ''

God :
'' Results, my son, Results......

While you Preached,
People Slept,
When he drove,
People Really Prayed.......''

" It's Performance, Not Position That Counts.....!!!!!! "

Awarded As The Best Corporate Joke.

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Saturday, 11 June 2016

роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯு роХுро│ோройிроЩ் : рооாроЯ்роЯுройா 'рооாро╡ு роХроЮ்роЪி' родாрой்.!

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роХாро▓роо் рокோроХுроо் рокோроХ்роХை рокாро░்род்родாро▓் роОродுро╡ுроо் рооிроЮ்роЪாродு рокோро▓ிро░ுроХ்роХிрой்ро▒родு. роОроЩ்роХுроо் роКро┤ро▓், роОродிро▓ுроо் роКро┤ро▓் роОрой்рокродை ро╣ேроХ்роХро░்роХро│ுроо் роХைропிро▓் роОроЯுрод்родு роХொрог்роЯுро│்ро│ройро░். роЗроо் рооுро▒ை роироородு роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯு рооூро▓роо் роироороХ்роХே родெро░ிропாрооро▓் роЖрок்рокு ро╡ைроХ்роХ ро╣ேроХ்роХро░்роХро│் роХாрод்родிро░ுроХ்роХிрой்ро▒ройро░்.

роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯு роХுро│ோройிроЩ் роОройрок்рокроЯுроо் рокுродிроп роКро┤ро▓ிро▓் роЪிроХ்роХிропро╡ро░ிрой் роЕройுрокро╡роо், рооро▒்ро▒ுроо் роиீроЩ்роХро│ுроо் роЗрои்род роКро┤ро▓ிро▓் роЪிроХ்роХாрооро▓் роЗро░ுроХ்роХ роОрой்рой роЪெроп்роп ро╡ேрог்роЯுроо் 

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рооூрод்родро╡ро░்

рооுроо்рокைропை роЪேро░்рои்род 72 ро╡ропродாрой рокெрог்рооройி родாрой் роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯு роХுро│ோройிроЩ் роКро┤ро▓ிро▓் роЪிроХ்роХிройாро░். родройродு ро╡роЩ்роХிропிро▓் роЗро░ுрои்родு 11 ро▓роЯ்роЪроо் роОроЯுроХ்роХрок்рокроЯ்роЯродாроХ родройроХ்роХு ро╡рои்родு роХுро▒ுрои்родроХро╡ро▓் рооூро▓роо், родாрой் роПрооாро▒்ро▒рок்рокроЯ்роЯродை роЕро▒ிрои்родு роХொрог்роЯாро░். 

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роКро┤ிропро░்

роЗрои்род рокெрог்рооройி рооுрой்ройродாроХ роЕрооெро░ிроХ்роХ родூродро░роХрод்родிро▓் рокрогிропாро▒்ро▒ி ро╡рои்родро╡ро░் роОрой்рокродோроЯு ро╣ேроХ்роХро░்роХро│் роЗро╡ро░ிрой் роХிро░ெроЯிроЯ் роХாро░்роЯு родроХро╡ро▓்роХро│ை роХொрог்роЯு ро░ூ.11 ро▓роЯ்роЪрод்родிро▒்роХு ро╡ிрооாрой рокропрогроЪ்роЪீроЯ்роЯுроХро│ை рооுрой்рокродிро╡ு роЪெроп்родிро░ுрок்рокродு роХுро▒ிрок்рокிроЯрод்родроХ்роХродு. 


рооுродро▓ிро▓் ро╣ேроХ்роХро░்роХро│் роЗро╡ро░ிрой் роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯிройை роХுро│ோрой் роЪெроп்родு, ро╡роЩ்роХிропிро▒்роХு роЕро┤ைрок்рокு ро╡ிроЯுрод்родு рокெрог்рооройிропை рокோрой்ро▒ே рокேроЪி ро╡роЩ்роХி родроХро╡ро▓்роХро│் рооро▒்ро▒ுроо் роХிро░ெроЯிроЯ் роХாро░்роЯு родроХро╡ро▓்роХро│ை родெро░ிрои்родு роХொрог்роЯுро│்ро│ройро░். 

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роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯு роХுро│ோройிроЩ் роОрой்рокродு рокுродிроп ро╡роХை роЪைрокро░் роХுро▒்ро▒рооாроХுроо். роЗродрой் рооூро▓роо் ропாро░் ро╡ேрог்роЯுрооாройாро▓ுроо் роУроЯ்роЯாрог்роЯிропாроХ роХூроЯுроо். роЙроЩ்роХро│родு родроХро╡ро▓்роХро│ை рокропрой்рокроЯுрод்родி роЙроЩ்роХро│родு рокрогроо் рооுро┤ுро╡родைропுроо் ро╣ேроХ்роХро░்роХро│் роОроЯுрод்родு роХொро│்ро│ роЕродிроХ ро╡ாроп்рок்рокுроХро│் роЗро░ுроХ்роХிрой்ро▒рой.

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роХுро▒ிрок்рокிроЯ்роЯ рооெрой்рокொро░ுро│் рооро▒்ро▒ுроо் роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯு ро░ீроЯро░் роЗро░ுрои்родாро▓் рокோродுроо், роЕройைрод்родு родро░ро╡ுроХро│ைропுроо் роХாро▓ி роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯிро▓் рокродிро╡ு роЪெроп்родிроЯ рооுроЯிропுроо். 

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роЗродройிройை роУроЯிроП роОройрок்рокроЯுроо் роУро╡ро░்-родி-роПро░் роХрооாрог்роЯ் рооூро▓роо் рокாродுроХாроХ்роХрок்рокроЯ்роЯ роХுро▒ுрои்родроХро╡ро▓்роХро│ை роХொрог்роЯுроо் роЕройுрок்рок рооுроЯிропுроо். роЗродройிройை родொро┤ிро▓்рооுро▒ை ро╣ேроХ்роХро░்роХро│ாро▓் роороЯ்роЯுрооே рооேро▒்роХொро│்ро│ рооுроЯிропுроо். 

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роЙроЩ்роХро│родு роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯு роХுро│ோрой் роЪெроп்ропрок்рокроЯ்роЯுро│்ро│родை роХрог்роЯро▒ிроп, роЙроЩ்роХро│родு рооாродாрои்родிро░ роХроЯ்роЯрог ро░роЪீродிро▓் роиீроЩ்роХро│் рооேро▒்роХொрог்роЯ роЕро┤ைрок்рокுроХро│ை роЪро░ி рокாро░்рок்рокродрой் рооூро▓роо் родெро░ிрои்родு роХொро│்ро│ рооுроЯிропுроо்.

роЙроЩ்роХро│ிрой் рооாродாрои்родிро░ роХроЯ்роЯрог ро░роЪீродிро▓் роЙроЩ்роХро│ுроХ்роХு родெро░ிропாрод роироо்рокро░்роХро│ுроХ்роХு роЕро┤ைрок்рокு рооேро▒்роХொро│்ро│рок்рокроЯ்роЯிро░ுрои்родாро▓் роХோро│ாро▒ு роЗро░ுрок்рокродை роЕро▒ிрои்родு роХொро│்ро│ рооுроЯிропுроо். 

роТро░ுро╡ேро▓ை рооро▒்ро▒ро╡ро░்роХро│் роЙроЩ்роХро│ுроХ்роХு роЕро┤ைрок்рокு ро╡ிроЯுрод்родாро▓ோ, роЕро▓்ро▓родு роЕро┤ைрок்рокு ро╡ிроЯுроХ்роХுроо் рокோродு роЙроЩ்роХро│родு роироо்рокро░் рокிро╕ி роЯோрой் ро╡рои்родாро▓ுроо் роЙроЩ்роХро│родு роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯு роХுро│ோройிроЩ் роЪெроп்ропрок்рокроЯ роЕродிроХ ро╡ாроп்рок்рокுроХро│் роЗро░ுроХ்роХிрой்ро▒родு.


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роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯு роХுро│ோройிроЩ் роЪெроп்ропрок்рокроЯாрооро▓் роЗро░ுроХ்роХ, ропாро░ிроЯроо் рооொрокைро▓் рокோройிройை ро╡ро┤роЩ்роХுроХிрой்ро▒ோроо் роОрой்рокродை роЪிрои்родிрод்родு роЪெропро▓்рокроЯுро╡родு роиро▓்ро▓родு. роЙроЩ்роХро│родு рооொрокைро▓் рокோройிройை роЕро▒ிрооுроХроо் роЗро▓்ро▓ாродро╡ро░்роХро│ிроЯроо் ро╡ро┤роЩ்роХுро╡родை родро╡ிро░்роХ்роХ ро╡ேрог்роЯுроо். 

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роТро░ு ро╡ேро▓ை роХро░ுро╡ிропிро▓் рокிро░роЪ்роЪройை роПродுроо் роЗро░ுрок்рокிрой் роЕроЩ்роХீроХро░ிроХ்роХрок்рокроЯ்роЯ роЪро░ி роЪெроп்ропுроо் рооைропроЩ்роХро│ிро▓் роороЯ்роЯுроо் ро╡ро┤роЩ்роХுро╡родு ро╡ீрог் рокிро░роЪ்роЪройைроХро│ை родро╡ிро░்роХ்роХ роЙродро╡ுроо். рооேро▓ுроо் роХро░ுро╡ிроХро│ை ро╡ро┤роЩ்роХுроо் рокோродு роЕродிро▓் роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯு роЗро▓்ро▓ாродродை роЙро▒ுродி роЪெроп்родிроЯ ро╡ேрог்роЯுроо். роЕро▒ிрооுроХроо் роЗро▓்ро▓ாродро╡ро░்роХро│ிроЯроо் рооொрокைро▓் рокோройிройை роЪро░ி роЪெроп்роп ро╡ро┤роЩ்роХ ро╡ேрог்роЯாроо்.

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роЙроЩ்роХро│ுроХ்роХு роЕро▒ிрооுроХрооிро▓்ро▓ாрод роироо்рокро░்роХро│ிро▓் роЗро░ுрои்род ро╡ро░ுроо்  роЕро┤ைрок்рокுроХро│ை родро╡ிро░்роХ்роХ ро╡ேрог்роЯுроо். 

роТро░ு ро╡ேро▓ை роЕро▒ிрооுроХрооிро▓்ро▓ாрод роОрог்роХро│ிро▓் роЕро┤ைрок்рокுроХро│ை роПро▒்роХுроо் рокроЯ்роЪрод்родிро▓் рооро▒ுрооுройைропிро▓் ропாро░ேройுроо் роХுро▒ிрок்рокிроЯ்роЯ роироо்рокро░்роХро│ை роЕро┤ுрод்род роХோро░ுроо் рокோродு роЕро┤ைрок்рокிройை родுрог்роЯிрок்рокродு роиро▓்ро▓родு. роиீроЩ்роХро│் роПродேройுроо் роироо்рокро░ை роЕро┤ுрод்родுроо் рокோродு 

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рокாродுроХாрок்рокு роХாро░рогроЩ்роХро│ுроХ்роХாроХ ро╡роЩ்роХி роЪேро╡ைроХ்роХெрой родройி роЪிроо் роХாро░்роЯு рокропрой்рокроЯுрод்родுро╡родு роиро▓்ро▓родு. роЗрои்род роироо்рокро░ை ропாро░ுроЯройுроо் рокроХிро░்рои்родு роХொро│்ро│ாрооро▓் роЗро░ுрок்рокродு роЙроЩ்роХро│родு родроХро╡ро▓்роХро│ுроХ்роХு роХூроЯுродро▓் рокாродுроХாрок்рокிройை ро╡ро┤роЩ்роХுроо்.

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роЗродு рокோрой்ро▒ роКро┤ро▓்роХро│ுроХ்роХு рооро▒்ро▒ро╡ро░்роХро│ை роХுро▒ை роХூро▒ுро╡родை родро╡ிро░்род்родு, роКро┤ро▓்роХро│ிро▓் роЗро░ுрои்родு роХாрод்родு роХொро│்ро╡родு рооро▒்ро▒ுроо் роЗрои்род родроХро╡ро▓ை рооро▒்ро▒ро╡ро░்роХро│ுроЯрой் рокроХிро░்рои்родு роХொро│்ро╡родே роЕройைро╡ро░ுроХ்роХுроо் роЪிро▒рои்родродு роЖроХுроо்.
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Friday, 13 May 2016

Exams in the pattern of IPL

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Students are demanding to conduct exams in the pattern of IPL ЁЯШ│

** EXAM DURATION-2 hours

** FOR EVERY 15 MINUTES THERE SHOULD BE A BREAK ....ЁЯШЫ

** FOR UNIMPORTANT QUESTIONS GIVEN IN THE QUESTION PAPER FREEHIT SHOULD BE GIVEN ЁЯдФ

**FIRST 30 MINUTES IS POWER PLAY (that means there should be no invigilator in the exam hall)ЁЯШД

**AT EVERY EXAM HALL THERE SHOULD BE CHEER GIRLS ЁЯСп

** IF ANY OF THE STUDENTS TAKE ADDL. SHEET...
CHEER GIRLS SHOULD ENCOURAGE &DANCEЁЯСпЁЯСпЁЯСпЁЯШЕЁЯШЖЁЯШЕЁЯШЭЁЯШЬЁЯШЭЁЯШЭЁЯШЭЁЯШЭЁЯЩИЁЯЩКЁЯЩЙ

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Friday, 22 April 2016

God Sue Satan

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An Engineer dies and goes to Hell. Dissatisfied with the level of
comfort, he starts designing and building improvements. After a while, Hell has air conditioning, flush toilets and escalators. The engineer is a pretty popular guy.

One day God calls and asks Satan, "So, how's it going down there?"

Satan says, "Hey things are going great. We've got air conditioning
and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this
engineer is going to come up with next."

God is horrified.

"What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake--he should never have gone down there! You know all engineers go to Heaven. Send him up here! " Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff. I'm
keeping him."

God says, "Send him back up here or I'll sue."

"Yeah, right," Satan laughs, "and where are you going to get a lawyer?"

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Monday, 18 April 2016

Fastest People on Earth

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Time Immortal Friendship of Kate Winslet and Leonardo Di Caprio

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Speed at NASA

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Thursday, 14 April 2016

switch to "Human Mode" from auto mode...!!!

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ЁЯШй 42°+ temperature in many places.... some one wrote to Sun...

Dear Sun,

Please go to settings>display>brightness and lower your brightness! Please, its too hot to handle!

ЁЯМЮ Sun's reply...

I have not changed any settings. Please go to your settings and...

1. Increase number of trees...
2. Reduce carbon emissions levels...
3. Reduce concrete jungles...
4. Increase number of lakes...

Basically, switch to
"Human Mode"
from auto mode...!!!

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Sunday, 10 April 2016

Amazing Lens At Right Timing

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Sceneries Pic Dump collection

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Eyes Cooling Wallpapers collection pic dump

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Cool Beautiful Pictures pic dump

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